Wikipedia: Notability sucks

Notability isn’t a measure of whether or not the person is actually notable. It’s a measure of whether or not the speaker actually recognizes the person being spoken about.

In recent memory, the following women have had their articles brought up for deletion:

  • the First Puerto Rican woman to become a U.S. General, as well as many other people who are ‘first’
  • The lady who took the first image of a black hole
  • A spokeswoman for a non-American government (Qatar, I think)
  • A famous actress in India

Wikipedians don’t give a single shit about Indian people, by the way. The site is famously racist against them, and sexist against women. Wikipedia hates Indian people because they think that the use of so-called ‘Indian English’ somehow pollutes the wiki. It doesn’t. It’s another Human language on this planet. Get used to them editing your wiki, fuckheads.

Wikipedia is shit in the first fucking place: assuming that anything can pollute it in the first place is perfidy.


In particular, Wikipedia, and what it is, and what it thinks it isn’t, is just fucking dumb. You’re going for a written work detailing the mundane world that’s nearly entirely collated by people who should not be entrusted, nor trusted with such a thing. The reason that the Wiki is entirely inundated with articles about niche software and pornography is because the people writing it are interested in niche software and pornography. They’re cishet guys, my dudes. You wonder why articles about women keep getting deleted? It’s because they’re not interested in a woman they can’t fantasize about dicking.

I can quite easily see why people have spun off and created their own wikis. In point of fact it’s because they want their own control over a repository of knowledge. This is a highly-seductive idea(l). Unfortunately running a wiki is much like taking care of the baby from Eraserhead: they’re never going to grow up, they’re always going to cry, and the only thing you have to look forward to is a metaphorical brick wall, for the rest of the days that you spend taking care of it. It’s not much different from a booru, though there’s much less uploaded child pornography. (I would hope.)

I’m genuinely sad that I didn’t subvert the wiki for my own purposes (getting a Verified Google Knowledge Panel). But, that’s just the thing. And that’s why I’m writing this.

The wiki is always going to be like this until you have the balls to stop Google from scraping your content. The only reason people make biographies about themselves on Wikipedia is two-fold, but folds into the same basic reason: vanity. They either get a Wikipedia page about them, which makes their conejos tingle, or, they get a Google Knowledge Panel. Just fucking stop Google from pulling up information about any more new Wikipedia bio pages, and putting it into a Google Knowledge Panel. Stop them from scraping Wikidata. I’m serious. This is not a threat: I’m telling you, people are going to continue being drawn to make pages about themselves, until you get rid of this little secret ‘avenue’ that everybody’s using to get that box (the Google Knowledge Panel) from popping up on their Google results.

I used to be obsessed with the idea, toot. The thing is, though, Google is temporary. I can already see it on its way out. This is the height that Yahoo! was once at; and you see how they’re floundering, these days. Google will probably be taken down by its own employees, whom Google has wronged. Specifically, Google will probably get something leaked about them, esp. if they keep on firing the AI research team employees. Again: not a threat. Merely a prediction. All of their former employees fucking hate them. If I were Google, I’d be terrified that they had some sort of secret internal information, and it was about to go to press.

In general, I would suggest that everybody at least consider the words of my Father: Never want something so bad that you’ll do anything for it. For one, it makes you stupid. For twoot, it makes you do shit you don’t want to remember doing.

In any case, Wikipedia is stupid. Why’d I come out and reveal myself? Oh yeah: because people were nice to me.

I never mentioned that one of the people who was nice to me, reported me to an Admin, as they suspected that I was up to something suspicious.

I haven’t the heart to tell them that, at the time, they were right. Extremely good catch!

To be honest, the reason why I didn’t do it is somebody left a plate of cookies on my Talk page.

Yep.

Did you know all it takes, for me to be unable to pull a trick on someone, is for them to be visibly nice to me, or especially someone else?

Yeah!

I can’t trick innocent people!

It’s weird!